Haters are only as powerful as you allow them to be
In a time where everyone who wants to communicate with the world at large can do so without needing to give a name or photo that accurately depicts who they really are, life can be strange. Just this morning a friend notified me of a message they received from a since deleted anonymous Facebook account urging them to consider a career change. Other friends have shown me similar screenshots from Twitter, Instagram, and similar platforms with similar interactions. Some of these engagements contain word usage that is downright mean, while others are filled with lies so cleverly pieced together the individual receiving them begins to question themselves.
The same thing happens to me. Just last week I received an email from an anonymous account insulting me for a review I wrote in the summer of 2013. I’ve also received countless messages telling me to kill myself or quit my career. They have become commonplace, or at least as commonplace as anonymous hate and rage can be, but I would be lying if I said it ever gets easier to see.
In fact, it is increasingly hard for me to not reply to these anonymous people and enter into what I know to be an argument I cannot win. I want so very badly to tell them that they are wrong about me, my work, my friends, and whatever else they choose to sling hate upon. If I could find their true identities I imagine my response would be very similar to that of Jay and Silent Bob at the end of Kevin Smith’s classic comedy Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back. If you’ve never seen the film in question, watch the clip below to see what I mean:
Wouldn’t that feel great? To confront the anonymous commenters of the internet and give them a taste of their medicine? The sweet relief that one might feel from unleashing a firestorm of rage upon someone who has made them feel small would probably incredibly refreshing.
But then again, maybe not.
The older I get the more I realize how closed off we become with age. Children are often able to welcome any new person with open arms and minds, as if everyone they encounter might be their next best friend. Adults don’t do that. We’ve all been through our fair share of ups and downs, which have inevitably given us a view of people that is vastly different from the perspective we had in our youth. This is often for better and worse, as it makes us cautious in a way we never thought we would be. The internet, or rather the ability to remain anonymous online, only makes this worse because we often rack our brains trying to understand who could possibly be so mean to us. Even if we don’t actually know the person we often cannot shake the idea it might be our friend, or lover, or neighbor, or maybe even a parent. As the hate continues, paranoia starts to mount, and the cycle of worry and fear continues in perpetuity until we snap or stop what we’re doing altogether.
I have had more than my fair share of blowouts with anonymous internet personalities and in my experience nothing beneficial ever comes from such efforts. You exhaust yourself defending something you don’t feel should need defending while the person the other end does nothing. If they do respond, which is not entirely unusual, it is to double down on what they have told you before. They don’t like you or something you do for reasons that only make sense to them. Maybe they like you too much, which again is something that happens without proper explanation or rationale. This is because their behavior is not rational, and nothing you – a rational person – can say will change that fact.
This Friday, July 15, marks the release of Sony Picture’s long-teased Ghostbusters reboot. Anyone who has spent any amount of time online since the film was first announced no doubt knows this to be true, as the promotion behind the film has been on overdrive throughout 2016. It seems every day there are new images, trailers, teaser, character featurettes, and related materials being made public, and I have no doubt those of you reading this now have looked through some, if not all of it. In the event that is not true, allow me to catch you up to speed:
Looks pretty decent, right? Maybe it’s not going to be the best movie of all-time, but it absolutely appears to be watchable.
If you live online however, and I assume many of you do, then you have no doubt heard about the outcry from many self-proclaimed “diehard Ghostbusters” fans about how this new film will suck. Whether these people are upset because the film now stars four women instead of the four men who lead the original film or because the initial trailers/footage did not live up to their expectations, many people have turned to social media and sites like Reddit to express outrage over the fact this movie has been made. Yes, in a world as crazy and messed up as the one we live in today there are people who make panning a movie they have never actually seen before it is even released in hopes they will somehow stop others from seeing it.
The crazy thing is, you don’t have to be a fan or frequent participator of film conversation to know this has been happening for months. Publications big and small have ran articles about the outcry from so-called fans about a film they have not yet seen. Even my parents, who are now in their 50s and could care less about the court of public opinion as it relates to pop culture, know that there are concerns from people that this movie might be a mistake. This tells me that even pop culture outliers are aware of the controversy, even if they don’t care about the film itself.
The question here is why? Why has a movie about fictional people doing fictional things spawned so much anger sight unseen? Why do anonymous commenters online, who mostly make themselves out to be men, feel personally attacked by seeing the male leads of the original films replaced by women? Why does the news of those original leads appearing in the new film not offset that rage?
The answer I believe, at least for some of this rage, is fear. These haters see their beloved film franchise undergoing an evolution and as a result they are forced to come to terms with the endless momentum of time. They connect a part of their own youthfulness to the franchise, and knowing it will no longer be what it once was forces them to recognize that they too are getting older. Just as the original Ghostbusters have been replaced they too will be replaced in time. That in no way means the new version is going to be bad, but it does mean it won’t necessarily be made for them. It will be made for the new them, and by that I mean the teens and young adults of today, and their inability to process the inevitability of aging expresses itself through outrage. It’s not about the movie, or at least not entirely. It’s about realizing they are getting older and understand the world continues to spin as it always has despite that fact.
This week, the first reviews of the new Ghostbusters have begun to emerge online, and – shocking as it may be – the overall response appears to be fairly positive. At the time of this posting the film has a 77% approval on Rotten Tomatoes based on 78 reviews, and many of those critiques come from major publications (Chicago Sun-Times, Us Weekly, AV Club, etc).
A logical person may think the positive reviews for the film would suppress the anger many have felt, perhaps they would even give them reason to look forward to the film’s release, but there is no logic when discussing why people express rage towards creativity online. In fact, many of those who have spent months being dead set on getting people to not see the new Ghostbusters are actively trying to hide the fact many are enjoying the film. As an example, here is a real screenshot from the official Ghostbusters subreddit captured earlier this week:
If you cannot make out the small print, it reads:
“We were doing a pretty good job of filtering out positive reviews of /r/movies (another, much larger subreddit), but they consolidated them into a mega thread and now people are starting to say maybe we were wrong. Is there any way to easily get the world out on social media that the positive reviews are probably all paid for?”
A few things worth discussing in response to this post:
– As a critic for a decade working in both music and film I can tell you first hand that reviews from major studios are never bought. I have spoken to critics from a variety of established print and digital outlets, including a few with much larger followings than my own, and not one of them has even been approached with such an offer.
– The intent of this post is not to reveal the truth, but rather to hide it. The people making and supporting posts like this want their narrative, which is the idea the film is so bad it shouldn’t be seen, to be the narrative people follow.
– The person making this post has presumably not seen the film. They are defending a stance they have no reason to take outside of assumptions they have formed based on promotional materials.
The crazy thing is, a post like the one above is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the lengths some will go to in order to try and shame the film. Here is another Reddit post from the same group:
This one is a bit longer, but just in case you cannot see the words in the image I have included the text below:
“For example a wife and a husband have an argument about the new ghostbusters movie. his wife wants to see it, but he does not, so he leaves upset, steps into his car, goes to the liquor store. Bus alcohol. While driving drinks it and thinks why on this planet did I marry such a stupid woman! Then an accident occur(s) and he injured 4 people.
Now 99% of the people will be angry at the husband for injuring 4 people. However the root of the problem was his wife + sony!
If Sony created the ghostbuster movie the fans + masses wanted, husband and wife would have happily gone to the new ghostbuster movie. Nobody would have been hurt.”
Again, this post is nonsense. The scary thing about it is that it may represent how some people actually feel toward the film, or at least why the feel the way they do. There is this assumption that Sony made the film for reasons other than pandering to the core fanbase, but there is no evidence of this fact outside the four women cast in the lead roles. One could easily infer the original commenter is trying to say the wife wants to see the film because of the women leading the picture, which speaks more to commenter’s opinion of women in positions of power than it does to the film itself.
We’re still several days away from the release of Ghostbusters, and I have no doubt those hoping to see it fail will continue to make posts like the ones above until long after the film has begun playing in markets around the globe. Whether or not their voice has been loud enough to impact the box office bottom lie remains to be seen, but in a perfect world they wouldn’t change things one bit because in all reality their frustrations are born from internal struggles with gender roles and the passing of time. They may keep some away due to the sheer volume of publications covering their hate, but strong word of mouth from those who actually see the film will likely outweigh their unfounded opinions in time.
To bring this back to music, I ask that you think about the way you and others discuss new albums before they have actually been released. We live in a time where people will take one song, or even a snippet of one song, and use it as reasoning for why a certain project or artist is not worthy of people’s money when the truth of the matter is that they know as little about the final product as anyone else. Even professionals critics, and by that I mean those with a legitimate following who are paid to share their opinions, know nothing about how a project sounds or works as a complete idea until they have heard the album in full.
The point of all this is to urge you to form your own opinions. Criticism in the modern age should be viewed as a starting point for conversation rather than an endpoint. Just because a bunch of people online have strong opinions on something they legitimately know nothing about does not in any way mean they are right. In fact, they are almost always wrong, and this applies to things outside the world of entertainment just as much as it does to new films or albums. If someone hasn’t experienced something for themselves then their opinion is baseless, and as such it should be taken with a grain of sand (at most).
Life is too short to blindly believe the irrational opinions of others. If you want to do or see or hear or experience something you should absolutely make time to do that thing, regardless of what others have said. If it sucks, or if you’re less than satisfied, then at least you can speak from experience and talk to others about what did or did not work. Hating things simply because they do not directly target or entertain you is dumb, and the proliferation of such thinking only makes those promoting it look as empty-minded as the ideas they claim to back. Be your own person. Form your own opinions based on authentic experiences and share them with the world. If you still hate the new Ghostbusters, fine, but at least give it a chance. Give all art a chance.
On the creative side, you cannot let negativity deter you from bringing your unique vision to life. Not everyone is going to love what you create, and some may even claim they hate it, but the beautiful thing about art is that it allows for a wide range of responses. Listen to those with a dissenting opinion who have a reasonable explanation for feeling the way they feel, but don’t let those hating for the sake of hating get you down. If you let someone deter you from chasing your passions because you’re afraid of what they might think you will never become the artist you were meant to be. Chase whatever passion you have until you have exhausted yourself, and when you get a little rest you should continue that pursuit once more. Never give up because one day, whether it’s release day or six years after something has come out, your creation will be seen by someone whose experience with your art will make a positive impact on their life.
James Shotwell is the Digital Marketing Manager for Haulix. He is also a professional entertainment critic, covering both film and music, as well as the co-founder of Antique Records. Feel free to tell him you love or hate the article above by connecting with him on Twitter. Bonus points if you introduce yourself by sharing your favorite Simpsons character.
It has been too long since our friend Andrew Jones of Checkered Owl appeared on the blog. Enjoy this new piece on haters, which was originally written in the wake of Andrew’s latest short film being released, and heed his advice. For fun, we’ve included the film as well.
Don’t read the comments. Don’t feed the trolls. Shake It Off.
The advice is all good, but in those moments when you encounter a genuine hater, it’s a remarkable thing. All your insecurities come rushing to the forefront. Every reason you are hesitant to create and to put art “out there” rings in your head. You can ignore them but it’s hard to ignore yourself.
But first slow down. Now stop.
You’ve already won. YOU took a risk, put yourself out there and YOU created art. They lost, because they spent their day pissing on your work instead of contributing to humanity.
To be honest, this is hitting me today, because I faced a hater.
I recently made a short film called “Finding Fairies“, it was my first time getting to direct my kids in a film and was a really fun project for us. The hater didn’t like it. Which is cool, it’s a family film celebrating childhood wonder, not everyone’s cuppa. That’s fine. However instead of just moving on with life, he decided to “call me out”. I don’t really know why people do that, or what impact they hope to have, but I know it wasn’t meant as a bit of encouragement or constructive criticism.
But here is the reality, his comments only made my supporters get behind the film more! More views, more shares. His comments only pushed me harder to let people see what we made! Is it a perfect film? No. But my crew and actors and actresses worked too hard to let anyone stop us, and we are proud of it.
Don’t let the grumblers win. Don’t let the haters decide what you contribute! Grab that negative energy and turn it around. Go do what you do best instead!
Whatever your artistic endeavour is, make it, TODAY. Write the song, post the video, create the pot, paint your door, write the next chapter of your book! Creating is an act of giving to the world, being rude isn’t. So take the high road and make something today!
P.s. If you would like to see the video it’s right below the post.
P.s.s. I hope you dig it, but if you don’t that’s fine too. Go make something better.
Hello and welcome to the ninth installment of our Journalism Tips series. We started this column as a way to help aspiring writers get their start in music, but over the last month we have been evolving into a place writers come to have their questions about life in the business answered. Today we are continuing that effort with a response to a question posed by one reader in regards to how writers handle the hate that comes their way online.
If you have any questions about developing as a writer/blogger in music, please do not hesitate email james@haulix.com and share your thoughts. We can also be found on Twitter and Facebook.
This may come as a shock to some of the younger writers reading this, but not everyone who reads your reviews will agree with, or even be able to appreciate, what you write. It’s not talked about all that often and it’s never taken to the kind of extremes that warrant news attention, but every writer that has developed a voice worth reading online has and will most likely continue to encounters people who disagree with their opinions on everything. It gets tough and, if we’re being completely honest, can drive even the most talented writers to ask themselves why they didn’t dedicate the last several years chasing after a different career, but it’s of the utmost importance you do not let such messaging break you.
The hard truth is that there is nothing you can do to prevent people from telling you that your work sucks. You are entitled to the opinion you have on the art you critique and the anonymous voices of the internet have a right to the opinion they have about your opinion on that piece of art. They also have a right to express that opinion, and there will be some who choose to exercise that right. The best thing you can do is learn to come to terms with the fact you will never make everyone happy and try your hardest to resist letting any amount of hate detract you from sharing your thoughts with the world. That is far easier said than done, of course, but that is the kind of mindset you are going to need if you want to make it in the writing world today.
There are no guides on how to handle the internet’s disdain for your work, but we can offer a few pointers:
Don’t be afraid to read the hate. You may learn to see things in a whole new light.
There will always be people who choose to express their disagreement with your opinion by telling you to kill yourself, but that is not the case with everyone. Some people simply see or hear things you may not, and reading their explanation for disagreeing with you may help you find a new reason to appreciate a certain artistic creation. Maybe you missed the string quartet on the closing track, or perhaps you overlooked a few subtle connections in the storyline of that recent indie film others were raving about. You might have a lot of good points to make, but you certainly do not have all of them. Others have insight to offer as well, and taking the time to listen/read and consider their thoughts will not only aide you in better understanding certain things, but it will also help you further develop a relationship with your readers.
Try to resist the urge to engage the nonsense.
Remember how I said there will always be people who wish you would kill yourself or otherwise have your life take a turn for the worse because you did not enjoy something they like quite a bit? You may want to engage them and go off with your own delicately-designed string of obscenities, but it’s important to realize from the start that you cannot win a war with the internet. Those haters are looking to get a rise out of you, and feeding their desire for attention will only result in worse words being swapped between people who otherwise would never interact with one another. It’s pointless. Move on.
Remember: It’s only the internet, and there a 99.98% chance the anonymous haters of the internet will never engage you in real life.
Every writer I know has been told over the internet, in one string of obscenities or another, that they are worthless human beings with poor opinions on pop culture who should either get cancer or kill themselves because they’re too stupid to do anything else on this Earth. You know how many of them have been told that in a real life setting while standing or sitting next to another actual person? None. It doesn’t happen. The @nickelback4ever and @musicsnob2006-s of the internet are not going to leap from your laptop or smartphone and grab you by the collar. It’s just text on screen, and it can only do as much damage to your spirit as you allow it.
When the going gets tough and you just do not think you can take anymore hate, do us all a favor and put down the glowing screen you have dedicated your life to and step outside. Close your eyes, take a deep breath or three, and remind yourself there is a lot more to this life than the opinions of other people. Be yourself, and be confident in your thoughts and opinions. Don’t let anyone take away what makes you unique.
